Love Chemistry and the Symptoms of Being in Love:
Why do I Feel so High
when I am in Love?

While we still don't know exactly why the "falling in love" process starts between two people, it is now a fact that people in love produce a higher-than-normal level of chemicals. Some of those chemicals - called "neurotransmitters" - are dopamine, phenylethylamine and oxytocin.

Another chemical released by the brain in love is phenylethylamine or PEA. Sometimes referred to as the "hormone of libido", PEA is a natural endorphin that makes people feel happy and attached, and that increases sex drive. It is present in large quantities in manic people. Again, if people in love appear a bit insane to others, it may be because they are!

It is important to realize that the chemicals released by the brain in love act exactly like drugs. With time, the brain becomes more tolerant and the euphoric feeling slowly disappears. If the couple is truly in love, passionate love turns into a more committed love. If it was just infatuation, the couple breaks up.

My own research and experiences reveal that the effect of those chemicals lasts between six weeks and one year, three months being the more common turning point of a relationship. The "craziness" of love chemistry rarely lasts more than a year.

Sometimes, the release of neurotransmitters stops faster with one lover than with the other. Cindy is still "addicted", while Ian is already sober. If Ian realizes he is not in love, he may end the relationship, thus leaving Cindy totally devastated. Cindy is still addicted and needs the "erotic high" provided by Ian. Because of the breakup, she will go through withdrawal and suffer just like any drug addict, not because Ian is the love of her life.

So if you feel high when you are in love, blame it on love chemistry: you are addicted to all the drugs produced by your brain!

Now, why doesn't this feeling last forever?

The in-love feeling that comes from the increased production of chemicals (dopamine, PEA and oxytocin) brings an erotic high in the new lovers' brain.

As it is the case for any drug, the effect doesn't last forever. As the brain gets used to the "drugs", the euphoric feeling tends to fade quickly, usually within one year, often less, and is totally gone by the middle of the second year.

Unless the symptoms of being in love are replaced with real love, the relationship ends. Isn't this a great incentive to develop a real relationship?

love chemistry, lovers, being in love